Tag Archives: divorce

Cutting the crap

Still no sign of this letter my solicitors supposedly posted last Friday, so I dropped them an e-mail this morning to let them know, and also to say that if it was just confirming that the consent order had been agreed by the court I could make the payment before I can make the required payment this afternoon if they get back to me by 12:30 (both my building society and the other solicitors are on my route home).

Cue a phone call from a lovely, but confused, girl. Apparently they had sent me the sealed consent order (huzzah, I think this means the courts have agreed it) on Friday, hadn’t I received it? Er, no, that’s why I e-mailed you. Oh. Was is sent registered mail? It is an important legal contract. Er, she’ll have to check.

Oh and we can’t apply for the decree absolute until the outstanding amount had been paid, had I received their correspondence about that? I’d received the correspondence showing that my account with the solicitors is in credit. Oh. She’ll have to check on all of that and get back to me.

Yes, yes she will, and she’ll have to do it quickly if I’m going to get any of it done before I leave. Incompetents.

Normally it’s me rushing around to get something for a client, it’s nice that it’s happening to someone else for a change (and I’m damn well not going to be charged for them applying for a replacement consent order and having it sent registered mail to me when I get back).

Meanwhile I have finally sent of thank you cards from my birthday (better late than never, right?), completely failed to finish the knitting I wanted to get done (the remaining 5 hours work will just have to be done when I get back), and packed for EJC.

Consent order curiousity

There is a history of correspondence going missing between my solicitor and I, so they have taken to calling me when any post is going out so that I can keep an eye out for it. They called this morning to let me know that they’d received the consent order from the courts and were sending it to me today.

in my not-quite-awake state I forgot to ask (though it was the secretary and not the solicitor calling) whether the order had been agreed or rejected. Hopefully it’s being returned because it has been rubber stamped and not because it has been rejected. Fingers crossed the decree absolute is included too. Alas it is due to arrive when I am away and I will have to wait until Sunday to find out (I’m not running up more fees with a call, I shall just have to be curious a while longer).

BT are muppets, it’s official

I had a lovely lady from Plusnet phone me up today to say they were having problems activating my broadband and phone service because BT had de-activated the number. I gave her a give rundown of what had happened so far and she said that for a fee they could get BT to reactivate the number today – restoring my ability to make and receive calls by this evening and getting broadband within a week.

Being utterly digusted by BT’s inability to do anything, I took her up on the offer and submitted an official complaint to BT for being rubbish.  A few minutes after submitting the complaint I got a call from a lovely man at BT saying that the way the change in the account had been done was completely wrong: it should have taken about a minute to change the names on the account and get a final bill issued immediately. The service should never have been disconnected and was there anything else they could help me with. Funny, if they’d told me this when I had started complaining on the phone I may have stayed with them, but since I had several conversations with a number of different people, none of whom had an alternative for me, or an apology, that ship has sailed.

Moral of the story: always put your complaints in writing (even an online contact us form), it seems to get things to the people who know how to resolve problems.

BT, please can I have my life back?

You’d think it would be easy to change the name on a phone account, but not with BT. To change back to my name (which the account was originally in) requires the account to be completely closed and a new one set up, as if I had just moved in to the property.


A request for the account to be closed was made, and I stopped being able to make or receive phone calls on June 30th (my broadband continued until that account ran its course on July 10th).

I obviously want to be able to make and receive phone calls and also arrange to get broadband again, so I put a call into BT last week. After about 15 minutes of being shunted around departments I am told that I cannot be reconnected until the final bill is issued and paid, and they put a rush on issuing the final bill.


The final bill was issued on 13th July. I spend 20 minutes on the phone today trying to pay this bill before the direct debit date of 28th July. Apparently I can only pay this bill early by paying by cheque. WTF?

I’ve decided to switch my phone calls to my desired broadband provider, but of course they can’t hook me up with telephone or broadband until BT releases the line, which they won’t do until their bill is paid. Meanwhile I remain unable to call in or out of my house, with no internet access, all because they couldn’t revert an account to its original holder.

Really, BT in this day and age is it OK for you to leave your “customers” without service because they want to change the name on their account? My mobile phone provider has to provide information within 2 working days when I switch companies, so why don’t you?

That’s that

As of this morning I finally got my house back.

There are still some final things to do (final bills to be paid, bank accounts to be closed, some stuff that was left behind needs to be dealt with, and the courts need to issue the final paperwork), but essentially it’s all done now.

Not sure how I feel about it all. Relieved, probably. Today is bound to be emotional (and I have a client meeting, d’oh), and tonight I get to move back into my room and sleep in it for the first time in almost 11 months. I might even move the furniture around a bit to make it differently mine.

In other news, I am awaiting on socks-in-progress to kill my fourth target with (they are in Australia), and I came fifth in last night’s poker (with an opening hand of quad 3s which I couldn’t be bothered to slow play and used to freak out my opposition).



All change

It was the Big Move this weekend, with lots of hiding out in the spare bedroom and in town to avoid seeing all of  the stuff being taken out of the house (including the fig tree from the garden). I kept myself busy taking 4 bin bags of clothes and other textiles for charity recycling, along with 14 pairs of shoes (which might leave me in a position of owner fewer than 14 pairs of shoes). Also braved the summer sales to get a new set of good kitchen knives and a new kettle (I shall have to go out again for replacement storage containers).

I have been assured that the remaining items will be cleared out today, so I should be able to sleep in my own bed, in my own room for the first time in 11 months probably tomorrow (poker tonight, so I won’t be back until late).

I also spent a relaxed Saturday evening in (after the horror of the cricket) watching telly, eating pizza, and confusing the cat (easily done). Had one of the best night’s sleep I’ve had in ages and managed to charge through a load of knitting in the afternoon. I’ve now almost finished my commissioned pieces, but this week is looking hectic, so may not be done until the weekend.

Juggling ended up having a surprisingly high turnout in the end, and managed to get some decent 7c 2-count on singles in, and 13 catches of 4 clubs (and turned the heel on my sock). Not bad going, but then I stayed up too late watching Top Gear and getting some knitting to a particular stage.

Dripping water

No, not a post about my new washing machine (which has a bigger load capacity than the old one, a time delay, and is generally just marvellous), but about delays with the divorce once more.

I signed the consent order (the last thing now required for the divorce to be granted and me being allowed to get on with my life) on 16 May and sent it back to my solicitor (along with yet another cheque). They call me on 21st May to confirm receipt and that it was sent on for the other signature the same day.

That was four weeks ago, so I e-mailed my solicitors to say “WTF?”. Apparently the other solicitors sent it on for signature 6th June. What did they do with it for the two weeks since they received it? Still no sign of it back with my solicitor, but they did at least chase yesterday (according to them).

How can it take 3 days for me to send socks to the US (in the time this has taken I have killed one person and received SIPs back, all via international mail), yet a piece of paper sent to a location 40 miles away takes over 4 weeks to get back to its starting point (Reading, London, Reading, Reading…….). Once received it still needs to be filed with the courts and agreed with the judge, which could take another 4 weeks. For an uncontested divorce it’s now been 10 months from separation and 8 months since proceedings were started. All of which I’ve spent living in my own spare room.

Further soliciting

Yes it’s a Monday, which means more calls to my solicitor (it seems that the second time I call I actually get through, leaving messages doesn’t seem to do anything). I finally got confirmation on Friday that the finances have been agreed and now it’s time for more legal documentation. This time it’s the drafting of a consent order which needs to be agreed and signed by both parties, and then agreed by the courts. Following that I actually have to pay the money out (my parents are loaning me what I don’t have) and the decree absolute can finally be applied for and granted.

Timeframe on the consent order being agreed by the courts is apparently about 5 weeks, so I may actually get my house and my name back by the end of June – only 9 weeks late. From start to finish that’ll be over 10 months from separation to divorce, and this was a relatively easy one (uncontested). Sigh.

Good news? Bad news? News

I finally managed to speak to my solicitor today (and approved the letter with my final offer). It turns out that they haven’t applied for the decree absolute (like they had initially said they would) because the financial settlement is still outstanding and it might complicate things.

She said that they would only normally do so if there was an urgency in marrying someone else. I replied that I was asking as it was the only way to get my house back (I am fed up of living in the spare room, but didn’t actually say that). Ah, yes. Suddenly she sees my point of view and the potential for this to drag out indefinitely.

The letter’s been faxed today as a final offer and there will be a follow up next week if there is no response saying that we’ll be going to court.

I’m hoping that there will be resolution soon, but “soon” is a moveable feast which keeps being put back and back, and I’m fed up of my parents asking every week if I have the house back yet.

Long Day

Started off being woken up after not enough sleep. It had snowed again, which was pretty. Unfortunately that seemed to have caused havoc on the railways and we all got to play platform ping-pong for 25 minutes until a train eventually arrived which we could cram on to.

Busy day at work, with my entire afternoon (in fact 6 and 3/4 hours) being spent sorting out extensions (there are no minions). Fun, fun, fun. Meanwhile the other work piled up with people asking where there stuff is and colleagues offloading their work “Can you do this tomorrow, and this, and this?” I wonder what would happen if I said no? Stupid professional pride making me care even when I’m leaving.

They were also talking about weddings today, which as a soon to be divorcee (please let it be soon) isn’t something I can get excited about. But I kept my mouth shut and just raged internally instead. I need to get some space from the end of this relationship as it’s still very raw, but that can’t be done while we’re living in the same house.

Got naggeed into putting my MrBollox pattern on Ravelry, only to be told that I can’t use fak as my designer name as it’s too short and reserved in case a knitting machine manufacturer wants it. That’ll need thinking about. I do have a couple of other designs ready to go up, but don’t want to have to call myself fakoriginal again, and am definitely not using my real name (at least not if it is linked to my Ravname). Ho hum.

Time to go home and, well the plan was to buy food on the way but the walkable shops will be closed and I don’t think driving’s a good idea, so crash out instead. Better play with the cat a bit as I’ve just booked her into the vet’s for her vaccinations which entails a walk along a couple of busyish roads. She seems to like it once she’s there, though. Lots of things to sniff and knock over.

 Tired now. Knitting to do.